January 2006 Archives

I was alerted to this via email. Thought I'd put it out there if you or someone you know would be interested in participating.

http://web.survey.psu.edu/transgender/

We are again asking for your help with one of the first large-scale, non-clinical studies of transgender identity development. The researchers are a transgender college administrator and a queer campus diversity specialist (full bios are below). We are undertaking this study because we feel that high school and college administrators, therapists, doctors, and other professionals who work with transgender people often have a limited understanding of transgender experiences, which leads to poor treatment and discrimination. The survey is being administered online to self-identified transgender people. I ask that you spend the 20 minutes required to complete the survey. Your participation in this survey will provide important information to obtain a clearer picture transgender peoples experiences. You must be 18 years or older to participate and your responses are confidential.

(Since I'm all about borrowing content from Casey lately.)

Casey notes the 20th anniversary of the space shuttle Challenger explosion and asks where were you when it happened?

Let's see... Twenty years ago, I was seven years old. Most people are in 2nd grade at that age, so I was in 3rd grade. I have this picture in my head of a classroom in my grade school, and the explosion showing on a tv screen. I remember seeing pictures of the astronauts and that a big deal was made about Christa McAuliffe. I don't remember anything about what I was thinking or what we might have discussed in my class or what my parents might have said.

Where were you?

Via Casey.

Complete with Google mapping feature. And it shows offenders in crimes against both children and adults. I was sort of suprised to find that there were only two offenders within a half-mile radius and eight within a mile radius.

From ThinkGeek:

Roses are #FF0000

Heh!

Since everyone else is doing it.

Get on my map! And that's not even a euphemism.

Please and thank you.

The Mondays, they just keep on coming.

1. When did it become OK to spend $5.00 on a stupid cup of coffee? Um, it hasn't. But I was much more likely to do it when I had more cash flow, and didn't mind having a ridiculous caffeine habit. Now, not only do I not want to spend that much on coffee drinks, I don't need or want all the caffeine that comes with an espresso shot. I will go into a coffee shop and order an actual cup of coffee.
2. And $2.00 on a bottle of water? Never. I don't even like bottled water. I'm glad that my new apartment has good, tasty water.
3. What color are your eyes? Brown. Poop brown. Okay, fine, milk chocolate brown. Same difference.
4. What is the last thing you purchased? Groceries.
5. Do you think celery and carrots belong in chicken noodle soup? Yes. And, for the record, chicken soup from a can is ass.
6. You've got a 30 minute ride on the subway, would you rather sit beside someone who is clipping their fingernails or someone who is cracking their gum? OMG, give me the gum cracker. I hate hate HATE random fingernail clipping. I have a thing about textures on my feet and so I rarely walk around the house barefoot. If I step on a fingernail or toenail it will totally skeeve me out.
7. Do you have a dream list of gadgetry? If so, what's on it? I'd like to have a video iPod, and a nicer laptop. If I had the money, I'd totally go for a MacBookPro, but I'd even be happy with a more-decked-out iBook. A Blackberry or a Treo or something like that (and the service to go with it) would be cool. I kind of wish I had a newer tv with the a/v inputs and outputs necessary to make it play nice with the rest of my components. A Roomba would be kind of cool. But none of those are Must Haves.
8. When is the last time you cleaned your bathroom mirror? Uhhh... about a month ago.
9. What is the last thing you do before you walk out the door in the mornings? Mornings for me are usually early afternoon, but the last thing I do is grab my keys, wallet, phone, iPod, hat, and mittens off the table by the door.
10. Ask me something. Still thinking about going to Spain?

Rocketboom asks. The people respond.

From the comments...
...The raw footage (And more from Minneapolis at Minnesota Stories.)

...A suggested question: "Why are American public schools so awesome?" Heh. Sad.

...A breaking news story:
BUSH PRESIDENTIAL LIBRARY DESTROYED BY FLOOD

Both of his books have been lost. A presidential spokesman said the President was devastated as he had almost finished coloring the second one. The White House tried to call FEMA, but there was no answer.

Via KathyHowe.

Your Stripper Song Is

I'm a Slave 4 U by Britney Spears "I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it; I cannot control it. I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it." You may seem shy, but you can let your wild side out when you want to!

A couple months ago I got my hair cut back to shoulder-length. She's been saying all along that it needs some layers and said layers would make it funkier which I could totally pull off if I would quit fretting about it.

I have some aversion to fluffiness in my hair, but it did look a little strange the way it was. So I let her go at it. At first she combed it out dry and snipped some off. That didn't work too well, the combing of the dry curls. So I wet it down and she cut some more.

Which was weird because black folks never get their hair cut wet. Always dry. And in my case, always blown straight. I suspect there's a reason for that, but I don't know what it is. But I figured what the hell, we're being adventurous today.

So she finished cutting and there was obviously quite a bit of hair missing. It looked cool enough, still wet, in the mirror last night.

But then I went and slept on it. It sure as hell looks funky now.

So I'll have to wet it down again and judge later today. Pictures to follow.

UPDATE: Fine! Here's a crappy camera phone picture. FG took this photo.

Since I'm not working today, I can get these out in a reasonably timely fashion.

1. What is your most prized posession? Am I shallow for saying my computer? Because I love electronic umbilical cord. My degree might be a close runner up. Not so much for its usefulness, but because it was expensive, and difficult, and I earned that bitch, dammit.
2. What one thing are you most proud of? My travels. I still don't think I've seen much, but I know I've already seen far more than most people.
3. What one thing do you regret most? That I'm not already seeing a therapist.
4. If forced to choose, would you rather cut off your own thumb or have your entire dominant hand surgically removed? Cut off my own thumb. I have good insurance and could still use those fingers.
5. What is your favorite dairy product? Cheese. Extra sharp cheddar.
6. Can you rollerskate/rollerblade? Yes. As long as the surface is really flat and really smooth.
7. How many pillows are on your bed? Four.
8. Do you have any pet political issues? Gay rights.
9. When you find out that someone has been lying to you and willingly hurting you (without even a hint of an apology) for 4 months, is it *wrong* to wish that some greusome and painful illness befalls him? Or that he gets his cold heart stomped on by someone else for the rest of his pathetic life? Oh, no, not wrong to wish it on him. In fact, I think you're quite justified.
10. Ask me something. What will be the next thing you buy?

Today is one of those days in which I feel like I've been extremely productive, but you can't necessarily tell that by looking around. My mission for today is to empty a number of boxes and tidy a number of piles. All in the name of organization.

I emptied one big box, filed a bunch of papers, threw away a bunch of paper, and somewhat organized my little corner of the "office" area. By "corner" I mean one half each of two shelves. Which is fine, because I don't really do anything that requires frequent and/or immediate access to office products and papers and stuff. It's just the electronics, which are all neatly stashed in a little plastic bin.

I'm still left with a pile of non-paper stuff on top of my dresser, a bin of paper products on the bookshelf, and a "To Look At, Preferably Sometime Soon" pile. I also have a couple of empty shoe boxes that I could fill with something.

Except I think I might be about hitting my limit for the day. It's yucky out, so there will be no bike ride like I had thought about yesterday. But I may go for a walk. To the ATM or something. Just to get some fresh air. Well, and some cash. I spent the whole day yesterday at home, indoors, except for my run. I'm a little twitchy. And, you know, walking and biking are free activities.

I decided 20 minutes before Desperate Housewives came on that I could bust out these oatmeal raisin cookies real quick. I did get everything mixed up in time. I jacked the tv volume way up so I could hear from the kitchen while I spooned and baked and then ran back and forth during commercial breaks so I could finish up.

I was impressed with myself for even having all the ingredients. Except that the only reason I had them was because Sherri bought them and made me cookies while she was here. Thank you, Sherri!

She always asks a good one.

I only have one question for you:

What do you love the most about your relationship with FG?

FG's answer to this question is that she likes that I take risks with her. Risk-taking is not generally part of my nature, but I've said "yes" in any number of places where I could said "no."

My initial answer was to say that I like that FG's so honest with me. Except that I usually end up cursing that more than enjoying it. I know in my head, and often in hindsight, that it's a great thing, but it's not always pleasant to experience.

So what I will say is that I like that we have enough similarities to create a good foundation to start our relationship from, but there are many things about us that are complementary that keep things interesting and make things work.

She's an extrovert, I'm an introvert. I'm pretty laid-back, she's... not so much. She's more of a go-getter, and that's inspiring to me. I like to be able to provide for her and hope that I can help keep her comfortable and settled.

That said, my answer probably was influenced by the fact that lately we've been reading up on each other's Enneagram profiles. I used to think I was Nine, but now I know I'm totally a Five. Fly Girl's an Eight.

The Enneagram analysis of our relationship compatibility* basically says that what I need, as a Five, is to get out of my own head and more in touch with the world. I think too damn much and don't do enough with that. What I can learn from the Eight is how to feel, understand, and utilize my own abilities. She can instill some confidence in me. She needs to learn to think ahead a little more, and I can help to temper and direct some of that energy with some thoughtfulness. She's the power, I'm the brains.

Also, we both "bring a common insistence on independence and non-interference from others" and "[relate] to each others' sense of dignity and hidden vulnerabilities." But when things are not going well, we totally poke at those things in each other, and then respond in our own (opposite) ways to the provocation. The Eight's way is to poke more, and the Five's way is to run away.

So we can do really really well together. Or really really poorly. And the key seems to be open communication. Funny, we've been talking all about communication lately.

That might sound like a bunch of hooey, but the more I read and reread, the more I'm thinking "YES! That's totally it!" with every sentence and paragraph. Like a light bulb came on. It's kind of a relief. I've read up on what my astrological sign (Taurus) and my Myers-Briggs (INTJ, but sometimes ISTJ) say about me, and the Enneagram has hands down been the best explanation of how things look and feel to me. What's neat about the Enneagram, too, is how it explains how your personality morphs as you become more or less emotionally healthy.

Off on a big tangent there, but I've been doing a lot of thinking about FG and I and our relationship over the last few weeks, so this has all been sloshing around in my brain.

*Full description after the jump, for posterity.

Anybody have any idea why Bloglines is all in Spanish at the moment? I checked my settings and I most definitely have it set to English.

I'm not really a fan of Jack, but I'm unexpectedly pleased to have scored as such.

You're Jack! You're ready to step up and take control of a bad situation. You don't let fear in, and you're naturally a good person.

Who is your "Lost" alter ego?
created with QuizFarm.com

Also, these giant tables they give you to cut and paste with your quiz results? Teh suck.

(via mel)

Since I don't seem to have inspiration or motivation at the moment, I'll steal borrow from Tiffany and turn to you to provide content.

So, I invite you to ask me 2* questions. I can't promise I'll answer them all, because really, there are some questions I just won't answer. But if you play nice, I'll do my best to cooperate.

Whaddya wanna know?

*Knocked down from four. Tryinna make it easy for you. If you have more than two questions, by all means, ask them.

Pictures here if you'd like to take a look around.

I just cracked open the first bottle of my second batch of beer. It's the Phat Tyre Amber Ale.

And.... *drumroll*

It tastes like beer. I like the one I made before better. But I don't think it's because of how I made it. It's just the type that I chose. Although I did let it sit in the secondary fermenter for waaaay longer than necessary. I have a problem with that. The brewing process is fun, but I hate doing the bottling. Actually, I mostly just hate cleaning the bottles. Putting the beer in the bottles is no big deal.

So now I've got forty thirty-nine bottles of this stuff to pawn off on people drink. Time for a party, methinks.

If you're so inclined to nominate sites for the 2006 Bloggies, might I suggest that you plug in Words For My Enjoyment at http://pauldavidson.net in the "most humorous weblog" category.

Pauly D is a sweet and funny guy. He gave me great advice for the Amazing Race audition. And he leaves me nice comments and IMs.

I was all wound up when I got home from work. Not in the good way. In the "several things are really irritating me" sort of way.

I think my bike got stolen. From inside my apartment building. Um, hello, community.

UPDATE: Not stolen. I had left it just outside my storage unit and had forgotten to put it back (it was around a corner, just out of sight). The resident manager saw it and figured it belonged to someone but didn't want it to get stolen, so she moved it to a more secure location.

Drama. Just drama. Trying to avoid drama resulting in the creation of more drama. (And, of course, I'm being passive-aggressive by blogging about it. You decide whether I'm being serious, snarky, or both.)

UPDATE: Actually, no update here.

And work was a brain drain for no good reason.

UPDATE: There's been a whole dust up with a material contaminant issue, so we haven't done much all week, and today is no different. Hopefully we'll get to chill a bit. I do not feel badly about this because we will more than make up for it later.

So the bike issue will have to wait until daytime. My part in the drama has been handled for the moment. And I still needed time to wind down, so now I'm catching up on the never-ending list of blogs to read and things to blog.

And I fooled around with my MT install on my other domain. Doesn't exactly decrease the levels of stress or brain-busyness, but it certainly passes the time. Actually the chief thing I was looking to remedy took disappointingly little time to fix. The upgrade to MT 3.2 didn't go all that smoothly on that domain, and it doesn't even have any content. So I'm totally not interested in trying to do it on this domain. I'm convinced I will fuck something up royally. Except that I've gotten used to using 3.2 over on Metblog. It's nice.

I should really go to bed. My eyes are sleepy, but my brain is not. Meh.

Comfort the disturbed, and disturb the comfortable.

Celebrating the birthdate of Louis Braille.

But since I know some of you care, I'll mention that nominations are open for the 2006 Bloggies.

P2P* foreign aid, people.

Through an agency called Kiva, you can PayPal a microloan to small business owners in foreign countries. Flip through the About pages. It's awesome.

What I love about this, and about groups like Modest Needs, is that 1) I understand what it's like to need just a little more to get by, and that 2) as someone with generally only a little to give I can really see the difference I'm making.

(via And, yes, I DO take it personally, via Mac)

*P2P = peer-to-peer

New Orleans style. Complete with alligator and swamp!

(via Bayou)

At our daily beginning-of-shift team meeting today, my supervisors were talking about how they did this polar-bear-swim-esque thing wherein they jumped into (and immediately back out of) a frigid Lake Minnetonka on New Year's Day. (I was gonna do it, too, but I chickened/lazed out.)

Anyway, my (female) supervisor was talking about it, and then one guy in the group asks, "What did you have on? One piece or two piece?"

Is that totally not a question you should ask your female boss? I thought so. I don't think she really answered it.

I thought about it, and I felt like had they asked my male assistant supervisor what he wore, it wouldn't have been as big a deal. But then, maybe my perception is colored by all the guys that said they ought to go just so they could take pictures of my supervisor and of Bosslady in their swimsuits.

The return.

1. How did you ring in 2006? At home with my girl. I was playing on the internet. She was asleep on the couch. Prior to that exact moment, we went out for Vietnamese for dinner and then rearranged our living room furniture.
2. How did you ring in 2000? On a farm in northern Michigan with The Boyz. I think that was the first year I went. It was right after graduation.
3. So far, which has been your favorite way to ring in a new year? My first trip up north with The Boyz was the best one. The New Years Ball was created that year. But then this year I was the happiest I've been in recent memory.
4. Do you usually make resolutions? Kind of. Not really. I try to have a goal or two and Think About Approaching Some Things Differently.
5. If not, why? If so, do you keep them? They're not all that concrete on account of that whole managing my expectations thing. More often than not, I make a "resolution" and then I can look back in a year and see whether or not I made progress, but I don't feel like I actively work on most things. Except that that's really not the case. Maybe it's just that I've had the same goals for the last three years and only just in the last year made some sort of progress on them. It's really only been since I've been relatively unhappy with the way my life is going that I've had anything resembling New Year's Resolutions. It's kind of like my need to make To Do lists to get anything done, because I require that small sense of accomplishment that comes from crossing something off, and because I can't usually focus for very long on one thing. I am all over the damn place with this answer.
6. Do you do anything superstitious at the stroke of midnight? Nope.
7. Did you know that we were all given an extra leap second this year? Did you use it wisely? No idea. I squandered it!
8. Do you have any new year's day traditions? Nope.
9. What are you most looking forward to this year? In no particular order: Running my first half marathon. Making things work with my girl, Fly Girl (note that that's something I intend to actively work on, and not just ride through as it happens). Maybe perhaps not being under severe financial stress for at least a little while. The possibility of not being in Minnesota by the end of the year (which I'm try not to think or stress about until I have more information).
10. Ask me something. Where do you want to go on your next vacation? I know you've always got something good up your sleeve. (Someone else already asked that question.) How about this one, which I've asked before, but since it's a different week: What's your new favorite thing this week?

Yeah, so meeting FG's family didn't suck. But before we get to that, there was my family.

I neglected to address New Years resolutions the last couple of years. I don't usually do specific goals. As I said three years ago, I generally Try to Think About Approaching Some Things Differently.

First, let's see how I did over the last three years.

I was flipping through my archives from this time last year trying to find what I may (or may not) have written about New Years resolutions. And I see all the stuff I wrote about Fly Girl and about going to Michigan for the holidays, and it makes me sick, knowing what I know is about to happen.

As a matter of fact, Fly Girl asked me yesterday if I thought after we broke up that I'd ever see her again. I told her I thought I might run into her once or twice around town, but then I figured she'd move to California and that would be it. And that sent me into a tearful account of what our "hiatus" was like for me. Not pretty.

Who knew?