"a pirate from Kentucky with a head cold"

Garrison Keillor did a bit on this week's A Prairie Home Companion about accents. A midwestern accent makes you sound kind of slow and like you'd be a good person to ask if someone needed to push their car somewhere. Or something like that. So you should consider attending the St. Paul College of Accents. Pick up a couple extras.

I don't think learning a Michigan accent is quite what he had in mind, but you could do that if you wanted to.

(via Alfie, via srah)