Yesterday’s Explainer column at Slate answered the question, “Was Britney’s Hair Full of Drugs?” Meaning did she cut her hair to avoid a drug test. Which I totally didn’t get at first. I was picturing little baggies of powder on her head. Seriously.

It was a long day. Anyway.

They explain how you can tell someone’s drug history by chemical analysis of their hair.

Narcotics like cocaine, meth, ecstasy, and PCP introduce toxins to the bloodstream that are then incorporated into each hair as it forms in the follicle. Urine and blood only retain evidence of these toxins for a week or so, but hair can hold on to them indefinitely. (When administered correctly, hair tests are about as accurate as urinalysis.)

Head hair grows about half an inch every month, so a woman with shoulder-length hair carries around a two-year record of her drug use.

Also, any hair that grows on your body contains this information.

Drug tests can be done on any body hair—armpit, leg, back, pubic—but head hair is preferred because of its length and relative cleanliness. Although pubic hair may be long enough to provide a few months’ worth of information, it is less reliable because of its likely contamination from sweat and urine.

All I’ll say is that I prefer my women with not more than two week’s history.

P.S. It’s interesting to read, but it’s more entertaining to listen to June Thomas read it. What is that accent anyway? Something British, I presume, but where exactly?

This week’s episode of The L Word was fantastic! I laughed out loud, a lot. Plenty of great sex. There was even a tender Bette and Tina moment, even though I’m over them getting back together.

There were some not-so-good moments, but the good far outweighed the bad in this episode. I won’t say too much more in case anyone hasn’t watched it yet.

Only 4 more eps to go. :(

Yay, Jennifer Hudson! Take that, Simon.

The Dreamgirls cast performance was the best of the night. The dance troupe backlit behind the big screen was pretty cool. Ellen was sort of funny in her Ellen way. Yay, Hellen Mirren. Now I’ll have to go see The Queen. Okay, maybe rent it eventually.

Other than that, kinda boring.

[Dorothy Surrenders live-ish-blog] [Notes on a (Non-)Scandal(ous Oscars)]

According to the news hype.

This is my car this afternoon. The bulk of the snow was last night, but it was this morning’s plowing that did me in. I didn’t have a shovel, so I kicked the snow away. Didn’t feel a need to go to the gym after all that. I was sweating like crazy, my glasses were all fogged up, and now my hip flexors are totally sore.

Finally got the car out, and then got stuck three or four times driving around the neighborhood looking for a parking spot on a non-snow-emergency-route.

Just enough snow to be really fucking annoying, but not enough to get me out of work tomorrow.

I really miss my Jeep.

It seems there are only two ways in which I can make myself get things done around the house.

One is to strap on the iPod and listen to podcasts while I work. It can’t be music. Has to be a podcast so I can focus on that and let the chores take place in the background, mentally.

The other is to do it in dashes, which means I’ll probably get the most done tonight while the Oscars are on and I do stuff during commercials. (And I’m only watching because Ellen is hosting.)

What I really want to do is march over to a coffee shop and sit down and do some brainstorming. I need to work on my personal/professional project, and I’ve got another idea for a new blog. It’s not a new idea, but it’s one that hasn’t been implemented yet in my particular area. Except on account of my dead and unchargeable battery, I have to completely shut down my computer to move it anywhere, and there darn well better be a plug wherever I take it to. That’s a poor excuse, but it’s keeping me from leaving the house with it. That and there’s, like, a foot of snow on the ground. There is a new battery on the way, but that’s not doing me any good today.