Can’t Pretend I Don’t Look Forward to The Bachelorette, Either

Poor Greg, Trista all started to dislike him because she didn’t like his NYC-teeny apartment. She looked like she kissed him because she felt like she should. She wasn’t sucking face like she did with Ryan. Ryan looks more like a Mike to me. All these guys are loaded already. Russ started talking all crazy (“maybe we were meant to meet”) like Mojo. More evidence that he’s freaky obsessive, he’s got, like, 30 family members waiting to meet her. Heh. Uncle Punka is delightfully close to Uncle Fucka. I liked Charlie’s mom. She was cool. It seemed like his fam was concerned that she was gonna blow off her home training and become some sort of L.A. floozy. They all cracked me up. I dig Charlie’s hair. I didn’t really like Ryan’s gift. I can’t believe Greg made up a birthday rap. His gift was nice (copies of the lyrics to the songs and the rap he wrote for her). Very thoughtful. Russ’ gift was nice, too (a photo from her visit to his home). Charlie’s was nice, too (the frog). I knew poor Greg wasn’t gonna get a rose. I LOVE Greg’s eyes. Awwww.

And Erik is such a bad mole. He’s so obviously The Mole.