John Kusch Has an Interesting Spin on Things

13 Dec 2003 By

Again.

Some Common Yet Often Unstated Arguments Against Gay Marriage

Here’s the Cliffs Notes version:

1. If same-sex couples were allowed to marry, marriage would no longer be a sure-fire way for people to prove they aren’t gay…. Heterosexuals will have one less manner in which to prove their heterosexuality. In fact, the only manner of proof they’ll be left with is the very act that defines them: having heterosexual sex. To fully convince their heterosexual peers, they might have to fuck in front of an audience or supply video footage. And isn’t that kind of gay?

2. If the civil marriage of same-sex couples is allowed, it will be demonstrated once again (for those Americans who have skipped a Civics class or two) that Church and State are, indeed, separate. No church will ever be forced to recognize a same-sex marriage, but no religion will ever be able to prevent same-sex couples from being married by a justice of the peace, either.

3. Same-sex marriage will send a message to straight society that same-sex couples … can be whole, complete, happy people without them.

4. Same-sex marriage will force everyone, gay and straight, to confront and address the shortcomings, inequities, hypocricies and outright failings of marriage.

5. No matter how progressive or open-minded they claim to be, most people do not want their children to be gay…. Nobody wants their child to be gay because being gay is difficult, and no parent wants any more difficulty for their children than is absolutely necessary. But here parental logic breaks down (not surprising, as parental urges are among the most primitive), since the obvious solution to the problem is to make being gay easier. Yet instead, so many people only want to make it more difficult.

It’s long, it’s strong, and it’s down to get the friction on. If you have the attention span, it’s a worthwhile read as it’s a different tack on the same arguments we’re sick to death of used to hearing.

  • http://www.musingsfromtheunderground.com Jay

    It speaks volumes about society when we look to anything other than actions to determine whether people are “good enough.” If I had children, and my wife is against it as much as I am, I would love my son or daughter regardless.

    In my opinion, those who oppose gay marriage do so from a position of hypocrisy. For example, people oppose marriage for a variety of reasons. I am from the wrong side of the tracks according to my inlaws. FEAR is powerful and the point about having to face marriage for what it actually is, as opposed to the myth, is scary for some.

    I am rambling because I just woke up but in the end, love is what matters, not sexuality. Period. Or lust. Whatever. Anyway, fuc* people who live according to some sense of moral superiority, condemning people without understanding that attraction has no boundaries.

    Sorry for the rambling.

  • http://feministe.us/blog/ Ms Lauren

    I agree that fear, miseducation and misunderstanding are the main points in the anti-marriage rhetoric.

    The BF and I have discussed what would amount to an attempt at becoming the first straight couple to have a civil union, actually testing the laws to have hetero-religious language removed from marriage laws.

    If I am non-religious and want to be legally bound to someone, why do I have to be “married,” a religious word and institution, do to it? Why should anyone else?

    The specs in the argument against gay marriage are generally so devoid of concrete logic that I rarely entertain them. Some other people who have thought deeply about the prominent arguments against it can be found here, here, here, and here. Go, Alas.

  • http://feministe.us/blog/ Ms Lauren

    Well, I screwed that up, didn’t I?

  • http://www.kazoofus.com Kathy Howe

    What Jay said.

  • http://picklejuice.yatescentral.com picklejuice

    This is off-topic, I know, but I always sang that lyric as “and I’m down to get some freak-shit on”. Had no idea it was friction. Huh.

  • http://www.swirlspice.com Erica

    Well, I screwed that up, didn’t I?

    I got your back. Thanks for the links.

  • http://www.swirlspice.com Erica

    I’ve found any blog-hosted “civilized discussion” of the matter to be frustrating beyond belief. The same people accusing gay people of being intolerant of their beliefs and their right to their beliefs are equally as intolerant and perfectly willing to uphold this unconstitutional denial of civil liberties.

    What really frustrates me is the people who agree with point #4 (that maybe marriage as it stands is kinda messed up), but who still hold it as a point against us and say, “Oh well, I still ain’t gonna vote in your favor.” What’s more hypocritical than saying, “Some people really fuck up marriage. Of course I wouldn’t/don’t. But I don’t trust you not to.” (often followed by “Think of the children!”) And then come the “statistics” on the high incidence of abuse/mental illness/disease that come with being gay. ARGH! I’m getting all mad just thinking about it.

    I think/hope that there’s actually a pretty large population of straight supporters who just don’t feel the need to get frothy-mouthed about it and so there are more people in my corner than it seems. That’s what helps me keep my sanity during these “discussions.”

  • http://keith721.dyndns.org/mt/ keith

    Straights are so afraid that one gay couple might prove them horribly wrong, beyond their wildest fears. Then, what would they have to speak badly of the gay people? They’re afraid they may have to finally accept the reality of a law or civic action they’re powerless to stop. And that loss of power frightens them.

    Of course, the churches used to frown on the civil institution of marriage as something only for families to unite and/or exchange their land, property, and wealth. Until the churches understood that their members were getting married, anyway. Then, they figured they’d better get in on the action. Hundreds of years later, you’d think the church invented marriage and wrote every single rule for it.

    If I’m rambling and ranting, I’m sorry. I was raised Roman Catholic, but I prefer to say “I survived being raised Catholic”. And anything that upsets someone else’s perilously balanced apple cart seems to be an earth-shattering event (to them, anyway.) Maybe one day, I’ll stop getting upset with the narrow-minded people. Maybe.