I’m sitting in a computer lab at work. There is a guy at the back of the room who is chomping down his food. Mouth wide open. Smacking. Breathing heavily through his nose. He sounds like dogs do when they eat.
My roommate eats the same way. Like he has to vigorously mash all food between his tongue and the roof of his mouth, and this can’t be accomplished without audible suction. I had to get up from the table and walk away from him.
Oh my god, this guy is slurping. Shoveling and slurping. I think he thinks his food is gonna crawl away if he doesn’t inhale it all immediately. He also likes to fill his cheeks, chipmunk-style. And then talk. I take it back. Dogs are quieter when they eat. I’m leaving.
